SV: 7-10 "Persona" Review

 

This episode answers a very important question. Who knows Clark best – Lana or Chloe? It also further confirms the Flana Theory. Bizarro is finally free to live on Earth (looking like TW!) and he spends his entire time on the farm... with Lana. What a pathetic fool!

Kent Farm: It’s beautiful day. Aw... it’s Lana and Bizarro in bed after having consummated their love. How sweet. Biz is staring lovingly at Lana as Lana wakes up. He says he wants to remember this moment. They kiss. Biz suggests that they leave Smallville. Yes, please take Lana away from Smallville! He offers to take Lana to all the places she’s ever dreamed of. He suggests they have breakfast on the Eiffel Tower and offers to fly her there. She laughs and reminds him that flight isn’t one of his powers. He replies that she makes him feel like he can fly. Lana gets up to go because she has a meeting at the foundation. She opens the blind causing the sunlight to hit Biz. He jumps out of bed. He suggests that she closes the blind and get back to bed. She closes the blind. Man, Lana is really stupid and self-centered - she hasn’t got a clue.

Grant walks into Lionel’s office at Luthorcorp. Lionel recognizes him as the editor of the DP. Grant replies that he’s not there about the paper. Grant says that it’s about something a bit more personal, paternity, and he drops a manila envelope on Lionel’s desk. Lionel says he’s been through this before but he’s surprised it’s from the editor of the DP. Lionel says he’s late for a meeting and puts his coat on. Grant says that he’s not above embellishing a story but there’s no way he could cook up this one. He tells Lionel that the only reason he is standing here is because Lex Luthor missed his baby brother. Lionel looks at the contents of the envelope. Grant says that it’s pretty amazing – using the DNA of the cord blood of your deceased son. Oh, brother! Grant asks that Lionel call him Julien. He adds that Lex warned him to stay away from Lionel but he’s his own man; and if Lionel has a problem with him he wants to settle it now. Lionel replies that if Julien really is his flesh and blood, he’d like to get to know him. He calls him “son”. Hey, Grant, it doesn’t mean anything, he calls everyone son.

At the Isis Foundation, Lana is looking over police reports. Biz walks in – he wants to know what she found. She says that another homeless man was murdered, the seventh in the last two weeks. The police believe it’s a serial killer but Lana thinks it’s the Kryptonian computer Biz mentioned. She goes to her computer room. She says that from the coroners reports all the victims were drained of their trace metals like the technician from Lex’s lab. Ooh, Lana has amazing computer skillz. Where did she pick them up? China? Biz thinks that Brainiac is regenerating using the trace metals from the humans’ bodies. Lana tells Biz that he must stop it. Biz says that if Brainiac doesn’t want to be found, he can literally disappear into the woodwork. Lana says that she can help with that (of course!). She triangulates the positions of the bodies to find a possible home base – Suicide Slums. Biz is impressed. Lana replies that Chloe’s not the only one who knows her way around a computer now. You know, I think I feel sick. Biz wonders what he’d do without Lana. Yep, I feel sick.

 

Biz arrives at Suicide Slums. Brainiac is powering himself up with a rat (ewww!). Biz observes that Brainiac has fallen far from his ivory tower. Brainiac is not amused. He, unlike Lana, recognizes that Clark’s not really Clark. Biz replies that he’s the new and improved version (hey, isn’t that what Clark said to the kid in “Lexmas”?). Brainiac asks where the boy scout is. Biz is not sure. He says that MM took him prisoner but he managed to escape. And where is MM? Shouldn’t he have figured out that one of his prisoners has escaped by now?!?

Biz says that when he got back, Clark was gone so he stepped into his shoes. Brainiac asks why Biz is not concerned how Clark will react to Biz being in bed with his girlfriend. Et tu, Brainiac? Must all conversations be about Lana? Sheesh! Biz says that Clark’s long gone. Biz says that he needs Brainiac’s help to stop the sun from turning his skin to stone. Brainiac replies that a good sunscreen and a large hat may help. Ha! Brainiac made a funny.

 

Biz, however, is not amused. He grabs Brainiac and vows to finish the job Kal-El started (getting rid of Brainiac). Brainiac replies that he’s in no condition to help Biz but a Kryptonian by the name of Dax-Ur can help him. He was one of Krypton’s greatest scientists. Brainiac says that Kryptonians that come through the portal carried a shield so they could be located. Biz asks if Brainiac is telling the truth. Brainiac replies that lying to him would be like lying to a mollusk, no point. Biz is amused – but he warns Brainiac that if he finds out he’s lied; he’ll shove him back into the test tube.

Biz comes into the DP to see Chloe. He notes that some people have lost their jobs. Chloe replies that they’re a casualty of the new commander in chief, Lex Luthor. Biz asks Chloe to help him find a Kryptonian scientist. Chloe quips that Earth must have been Clark’s home planet’s top tourist destination. She asks how Biz heard about this Kryptonian. Biz lies that Jor-El told him. Chloe says that she’s very busy. Biz, exasperated (I love his expression), says that the only way he’s going to find this guy is to hunt down the tracking device. He suggests Chloe use the DP archives to find the people who were rumored to have found it. Chloe replies that she doesn’t have the time. She asks if this can wait. Biz says that it’ll only take a second. As soon as he finds who has the shield he’ll be out of her hair. Chloe looks confused. She asks if he already has one of those. Now Biz looks confused. Chloe reminds him of the Kryptonian SOS from the time capsule; beauty pageants; gorgeous gold diggers (thanks for reminding me, Chloe).

Chloe suggests that Biz go home, take a breather and she’ll call him later. Biz grabs Chloe’s arm and asks where it is. Chloe gives him a look. He releases her arm, apologizes and says he really needs to find it. He says he was hoping she could jog his memory. Uh oh. Chloe says that he never forgets anything – his mind is like a titanium trap. Go, Chloe! Biz smiles not-Clark-like and asks if she remembers where he put the shield. Chloe says that she can’t help him.

Lionel walks into the only room in the Luthor mansion. He asks Lex what was so important he had to pull him away from a crucial negotiation. Lex replies that according to the Luthorcorp visitors’ log, Grant came to see him yesterday. Lionel says that Grant came to see him to discuss one of Lex’s latest projects; one that Grant’s involved in. Lex reminds Lionel that newspapers are nothing but lies delivered daily. Lionel thinks he may have underestimated the power of the media. Lionel says that he was curious about Grant. When Lex asks what Lionel thought of him, Lionel replies that Grant is insightful, direct, and courageous – Lex’s direct opposite.

 

Lex says that he’ll deal with Grant. Lionel notes that Lex is talking like Grant belongs to him. Lex realizes that Lionel knows about Grant. Lionel drops the act and asks if Lex has the right to recycle his dead brother as if he were part of a sick vanity project. Lex replies that he did what Lionel was too afraid to do. Lionel says that what Lex did was depraved and disgusting. Uh, pot meet kettle? Didn’t Lionel do the exact same thing with Emily Dinsmore? Writers, are you retconning again? Lex asks if Lionel wouldn’t want to see Julien again – the son he lost. Lionel says that it’s Lex he’s lost. Well, it wasn’t from lack of trying, Lionel.

 

Kent Farm: Lana comes in with the groceries. Chloe is waiting for her. Lana asks what Chloe is doing at the house. Chloe replies that she was looking for Clark. He came by the Planet and was acting beyond weird. She asks if Lana has noticed anything different about him. Eh, Lana only notices her bellybutton. Lana replies that she has noticed something different – Chloe looks triumphant – Lana adds that he’s finally opened up and let her in – Chloe’s face falls. Lana says that Clark’s more understanding that ever. Chloe looks confused. Chloe tells Lana about Clark forgetting about the Kryptonian shield. She says that the Clark she knows would never forget something like that. Lana says that Chloe doesn’t know him as well as she thinks. Lana thinks that after everything that Clark’s been though, he’s taking time to focus on his own happiness (her!). Lana adds that his priorities are different. Chloe replies that his priorities may be different but his personality is in a whole other universe. Go, Chloe! Chloe says that she’s been a part of Clark’s inner circle for awhile and she knows when he’s not himself. Lana replies that maybe it’s time for Chloe to let go of him. Chloe says that she’s not hanging on and there’s something wrong with Clark.

Biz comes in the door. He notes that Chloe seems tense. He asks if Lana’s told Chloe about the move. Biz informs Chloe that he and Lana are leaving Smallville. Chloe is speechless. She leaves. Biz asks if Chloe’s okay. Lana tells him that Chloe thinks there is something wrong with him. She tells him about forgetting about the Kryptonian shield. Clark says that he didn’t forget about it; he can’t find it. He believes that Kara took it. Think again, Biz! Lana suggests he look in the Fortress. Biz smiles.

Biz flies to the Fortress to ask for Jor-El’s help to locate the shield. Jor-El, unlike Lana, realizes that that’s not Kal-El. He tells Biz to leave at once. Biz asks what Jor-El’s going to do; lecture him to death. Ha! Biz said a funny! Jor-El is not amused. The Fortress darkens and shakes. Biz says that he’ll find the shield sooner or later and leaves. Jor-El wisely lets Clark out of his Popsicle prison to stop Biz.

Clark comes running into the Kent house. He frantically looks for Lana (oh, why couldn’t Biz have disposed of her? He had weeks!). Lana comes in and Clark hugs her. He’s glad she’s okay. Lana is confused. She asks why she wouldn’t be okay after only one hour. Clark tells her that it’s been weeks. Lana tells him that she realizes that time is different in the Fortress but it’s only been one hour since he left to find the shield at the Fortress. Oh, Lana. Clark explains that it wasn’t him. It was the phantom. He’s been trapped by Jor-El in the Fortress for weeks. Jor-El released him to find the phantom. Hmm, does that mean Clark has to get back to the Fortress once he’s disposed of the phantom?

Lana doesn’t believe him. She insists that it was him. She tells him that Chloe believed something was wrong with Clark’s memory. She tells Clark to try to remember how, in bed, he said he was going to fly her to Paris. Oh, Lana. Poor Clark – he looks incredulous. She adds that they were going to leave Smallville together. Clark says that he’s sorry, everything is his fault. Oh, please! Clark, grow a brain, how is this your fault? If anything, it’s Jor-El’s fault and Lana’s fault for being so gullible. Outside, Biz is listening to their conversation.

Brainiac is wandering Suicide Slums. Biz appears. He tells him that Clark is back. Biz wants to kill Clark but when he gets near green K, he absorbs it. Brainiac says that he’ll kill Clark. Biz notes that Brainiac can barely keep himself going. Brainiac warns Biz not to underestimate him. He suggests that Biz continues the search for Dax-Ur. Biz says that he wants to get Lana away from Clark first. Oh, brother. What an idiotic phantom. He looks like Clark so he has to be as dumb as Clark? Brainiac looks amused. He tells Biz that if he falls prey to the same human emotions, he opens himself up to the same weakness. Biz replies that he is nothing like Clark. Brainiac suggest that he divert Kal-El while Biz goes for Lana.

At Luthorcorp, Lionel is looking at himself in the mirror. Doesn’t he have work to do? Clark rushes in explaining about being trapped in the Fortress while the phantom’s been with Lana. Lionel naturally asks if Lana is okay. WTH? Clark says that he’s brought Lana to Oliver’s tower (of course, Biz would never think to go to Oliver’s pad *sarcasm*). He asks how to get rid of the phantom for good. Lionel, as Jor-El’s emissary, says that Clark must expose the phantom to blue K. Clark is confused. He notes that everything affects them the opposite – blue K takes away his powers so, logically, it should make Biz stronger. Lionel says that it’ll increase Biz’s powers exponentially and his body won’t be able to handle it. Ooh, exploding Biz! Clark asks where he can find blue K. Lionel explains that another Kryptonian is on Earth, Dax-Ur. He says that Dax-Ur will have what Clark needs. When Clark asks why Lionel didn’t mention this before, Lionel replies that Dax-Ur disappeared. Clark remembers the shield he found in the time capsule. Lionel says that if Clark activates the shield it’ll lead Clark to Dax. Clark wonders how to activate the shield. Lionel says that he’s to hold it and say Dax’s name. There’s a lot of exposition in this scene. Whew. Lionel heads to the elevator where he switches to Brainiac! Whoa - I didn't see that one coming.

 

Clark comes barging into Planet. He tells Chloe that he’s glad she’s okay. Uh, Clark, shouldn’t you explain what’s going on first? Chloe says that she’s just been told that he and Lana are leaving Smallville; she not okay. Clark explains about the phantom and the Fortress. Chloe is wary. She asks how she knows that he’s the real Clark. Clark insists that he’s Clark. As he tells Chloe about the Kryptonian shield he walks toward her. Chloe backs up. She says that the other Clark was looking for the shield too. Clark starts to approach again and tells her to look him in the eye. Chloe backs up again. I love this scene. Clark says that if he was the phantom, direct sunlight would affect him. He walks into the sunlight. Nothing happens. Chloe jumps in his arms. They hug. Aw. Clark says that he needs the shield to destroy Bizarro. Chloe says that the way he was acting she wasn’t sure what would happen if he found it so she went to the farm and "borrowed" the shield. She gives it to Clark. Clark notes that Chloe saved him again. Clark holds the shield, says Dax-Ur’s name and disappears.

Clark reappears in Dax-Ur’s garage. They make small talk. Dax’s son comes running in followed by Dax’s wife, Grace. Clark is surprised that Dax has a family and lives like a human. Hey, that means Clark can have children! Clark asks about the blue K. Dax shows him a bracelet?! Man that’s ugly. Dax explains that he didn’t put in on right away. He realized that in creating Brainiac, he had created something that could destroy worlds. So he came to Earth to clear his conscience (or to escape the destruction of Krypton. Just sayin’).

Clark says that Dax gave up his abilities for Grace. Dax replies that he knew in a heartbeat. Oh, brother. Drop it already. Clark asks if Dax has more blue K. Dax produces a huge rock and gives it to Clark who stores it in a lead box.

In the safety of Oliver’s tower *sarcasm*, Lana tries to call Clark on her cell. Biz shows up behind her. He says that the phantom found Brainiac and they are now working together. He adds that he can’t take them down on his own. Lana says it’s her fault. Biz says no. They hug. Lana sees Biz’s face change in the glass. Lana says that she needs to get her bag. She grabs her phone and texts Clark. Biz realizes what she’s doing. Lana runs away from him. He assures her that he’d never hurt her. Lana calls him a monster. Biz says that when he came to Smallville, the only thing that mattered was his own survival but it all changed when he met Lana. Can’t the writers come up with new dialog? Must every man, woman, child, superhero, supervillain, and phantom fall for Lana?

Clark shows up and tries to use the blue K on Biz. Biz throws him thirty feet. Eh, he is like Clark. Lana (the hero) grabs the blue K. She asks Clark if this will destroy Biz. Clark tells her to run; that with the blue K, he loses his abilities and can’t protect her. Lana says she’ll do this herself. She tells Clark to stay back. Biz pleads his case. He reminds her that she said she was the happiest she’d ever been. Biz says that Clark doesn’t love her like he does. Man, all this Lana-loving had better lead to the Flana Theory. Clark yells it’s a lie. Biz says that Clark is lying to himself; he is so worried about doing the right thing, he doesn’t even see. Huh? Could you elaborate, Biz? Biz tells Lana that Clark won’t commit his life to her like he will. Lana looks torn until she puts the blue K in Biz’s hand. He explodes but not before telling Lana he loves her. Whatever.

Brainiac comes into Dax’s garage. He explains who he is. Dax tries to remove his bracelet. Brainiac stops him. Dax asks what he wants. Brainiac says that he needs the information in Dax’s mind. Dax says he’ll never tell him. Brainiac says that Dax doesn’t have to talk. He stabs Dax in the head to drain his knowledge.

Lex comes into Grant’s office. Grant asks how he’s supposed to run a world-class newspaper with limited staff. Lex replies that Grant is fired. Lex tells Grant that he warned him not to go near Lionel; Lionel’s dangerous. Lex adds that he trusted Grant and Grant shouldn’t have gone to see Lionel. Grant doesn’t understand why and mentions that he’s having supper with Lionel. He adds that Lionel wants to get to know him. Lex calls Grant naïve. Grant tauntingly asks if Lex is afraid that he (Grant) will become the favorite son. Lex insists that Lionel could have Grant killed and that he needs to leave as soon as possible. Grant replies that Lex only looks out for Lex. Lex warns Grant not to turn his back on him. Grant tauntingly asks how many times Lex’s been married. Lex reminds Grant that he (Grant) owes him. Grant replies that Lex is so lonely and pathetic that he had to build himself a brother. Lex angrily warns Grant that if he turns his back on him, Grant will be throwing everything away. Don’t say you haven’t been warned, Grant.

After the supper, Grant and Lionel make small talk. Suddenly a guy comes out of nowhere demanding their money. Grant produces his wallet but is shot multiple times. Good riddance.

 

At the mansion, Lex gets a text message saying that the job is done. Lex goes outside in the rain and screams.

Over at the Kent farm, the honeymoon’s over... till next week.